Okay, so counting the number of months took me a while there, but I managed to get it right. My baby girl will be 1 until she turns 2. Because I’m that kind of mom! I am literally in awe as to how much I have learned these past couple of months. Being a parent truly is extraordinary; it’s scary, it’s exciting, it’s exhausting but so so rewarding. I am in love with my little monster, more and more, as time goes one. She teaches me resilience, patience, and gratitude for the little things that come our way. We, as adults, tend to forget to have fun and we focus so much on work and hustling that we end up simply existing and not truly living. My daughter taught me to take a step back, chill and live life to the fullest. A little like Frida Kahlo; Viva la Vida! I decided to take some time off from running a business and I am suffering the consequences in terms of producing and creating, but the time I spent with my daughter is far more important. The little girl, in her 16 months of life, has been through so much, from sickness to pain, to broken bones, and yet she’s still smiling and killing it at life.
Living with an infant is so insane and I am super blessed to experience the wonderful (and not so wonderful) things that come with it. Some days are good, some days are meh and some days I feel like punching myself in the face for ever having a child. However, I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. Because after a long day’s work, a little hug from Luna makes everything so much better.
Since having her, I have acquired the art of being patient, which is a skill that is necessary for maintaining low blood pressure! Haha! I am also good at controlling my anger, my anxiety, and my frustrations. I try 10 times harder to stay positive, strong and calm for her sake. And on the days, I feel like crap, I try to keep it in till when she’s asleep or out in daycare. It’s hard being a parent. Especially being a single one! Okay, let me rephrase, I am still married but since my husband is away studying (in Ottawa) and we only see him once or twice a month, I pretty much take care of the baby alone (with my family’s help). I want to take a brief moment to salute all the mamas and papas out there doing it alone because to be in your shoes takes courage and grace. I sort of feel your pain, I am not nearly going through the same struggle as you and I feel the pain. So, kudos! Stay strong and keep on!
Little one has such a badass personality, it’s insane! Like how can someone so little have so much sass?! It kills me! Makes me want to bite her little cheeks!!! She’s fearless and wants to try everything. Doesn’t take no for an answer! Although she broke her ankle at 10 months old, she’s still so blasé about everything. It took us a while to get her to walk but seeing her do her little step now is like a miracle. With that, comes along the exploring, she wants to go up and down the stairs, open drawers and stick her hand in the toilet seat. I have to run after her all the time but seeing her happy makes me extra happy. She loves reading, giggling and her little black cat (a stuffed toy I bought her when she was 4 months old). She inspires me and pushes me to always be the best version of myself.
So, after forming a wonderful bond with my child, I am still a psycho, overprotective mama bear—I want nothing but her happiness and wellbeing. It makes me want to gag because I never thought I’d be this mushy inside. I am so robotic when it comes to emotions and I sometimes come across as a b**ch, but I am super sensitive and caring…just have a hard time showing it. Therefore, being a mom is quite interesting and my daughter is teaching me as much as I am her.
And that’s the lesson kids! Children teach you things too!